Whoever coined the phrase “shy as a violet” must have had little experience with that delicate denizen of the woods and meadows. My recent experience with this wildflower convinced me that the violet is anything but shy.
When a violet plant voluntarily took up residence in my herb garden, I hesitated to remove it. After all, its purple blossoms added a vibrant touch of color, tucked between the verdant clumps of oregano and the graceful green spires of chives. The heart-shaped leaves were attractive, and its subtle scent evoked memories of my teenage years when salesgirls at Woolworth offered samples of violet perfume. Moreover, the flower is edible. Visions of violet blossoms sprinkled on my salads or candied to decorate cakes convinced me it qualified to remain among my herbs.
Thus that single violet plant seduced me, and I left it to grow amidst the tarragon, oregano, basil and chives. To grow – and multiply. Before long the bare soil around the mother plant was peppered with tiny seedlings. I discovered that each flower produces a seed pod that pops open, releasing dozens of miniscule seeds.
Soon all the space between my herbs was filled with purple violets, despite my efforts to remove the seedlings with a cultivating fork. With a touch of regret, I tugged at the mother plant, but its roots held firmly. Using my trowel to uproot it, I discovered an underground system of roots and rhizomes that threatened to conquer the entire garden and choke out the original occupants.
Deciding that control of this aggressive plant was impossible, I placed it in the same category as wiregrass and dandelions and determined to eradicate it. Each clump I removed left behind enough rhizomes to assure a healthy stand of violets for the future. What began as a single “shy” violet squatter had staked out its claim. And each year I must struggle to control it.
This spring as I dug out the violets, I reflected on the subtle way the flower seduced me, noting the similarity to some personal relationships. Have you ever been taken in by some helpless individual’s flattering words and apparent fragility? Once you succumb, you face increasing demands, until you find yourself under the control of an allegedly vulnerable person.
The shy, sweet individual may use these attributes to gain whatever she wants. (Yes, it’s often a female, although sometimes these tactics have been used by those of the opposite gender.)
As a teacher, I was always on guard to avoid the charm of sweet little girls or flattering boys who attempted to gain favors. Their beguiling behavior tempted me to reward them by choosing them for special jobs, such as passing out papers or pencils, being first in whatever activity was at hand.
As parents, my husband and I often encountered similar attempts by our children to soften our reserve concerning certain wishes they entertained. On one such occasion my husband had refused to let them get a dog because (1) he felt the city was no place to own a dog and (2) they could enjoy the company of other dogs who lived in our neighborhood. A third, unmentioned objection was the trouble and expense of boarding a pet when the family needed to leave town.
The children formed a conspiracy, with the assistance of a friend whose dog had given birth to a litter of six puppies. The friend brought a puppy to our house and Dad was exposed to his daughter’s helpless look of longing as she played with the puppy. He gave in and we became dog owners – and dog lovers.
Ultimately, I surrendered to the violets as well. Although each spring I remove the seedlings, I’ve compromised and actually enjoy the positive characteristics of the clumps of color that spring up among the herbs. I admire their charming attributes, but I definitely do not describe this hardy, aggressive plant as “shy.”
Shy begonias anyone?
