Wild Bill’s Weekly Sports Roundup

Bill TurnerThere’s nothing better than the Christmas season, and I want to begin by wishing everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

As another year winds down for the Wild Bill column, big shout outs go to each and every reader who keep the column full of presents under the tree 52 weeks a year. You guys and gals are great.

Also, I want to give a big round of applause to the gang at Loudmouth, the sponsor of the great pants seen in the column picture, which help make a fashion statement at games throughout the year.

Now, off we go to current matters at hand, where we’ll congratulate two teams for their state championship football runs, take a preview of three holiday boys basketball tournaments and finish with four gifts in the Wild Bill countdown to Christmas. Plus, a peek in the mailbag. The stocking is full, so let’s get it going.

Congratulations to “Big-11” member Glenvar for their 20-14 overtime win over Wilson Memorial in the VHSL Group 2A state championship football game last Saturday at Salem Stadium. I first trekked to Highlander Stadium in the summer of 2007 to see new head coach Kevin Clifford during preseason practice as he embarked on his coaching tenure at Glenvar. Seven years later, it’s all come together with the Highlanders winning the first football state championship in school history. The win will be forever etched in Highlander football lore, as will the 35-0 win over Giles that paved the way to Salem.

Congratulations also go out to the Salem Spartans and head coach Stephen Magenbauer for making it to the Group 4A title game at Liberty University before falling to multi-talented Lake Taylor. The 41-16 loss was Salem’s first setback of the season after 14 impressive wins.

After all the turkey and ham during the holiday week, no better way to relax than checking out three boys basketball tournaments.

The Northside Invitational plays out December 27, 29 and 30th in the Northside gym off Peters Creek Road. A top field of teams again makes the Northside Invitational a great look during the holidays.

The K-Guard Holiday Hoopla takes center stage at the Salem Civic Center December 29, 30 and 31st. The three-day, 8-team tournament has been a long running highlight of pre-New Years basketball. This year’s final on New Years Eve will allow plenty of time to get home in time to see the ball drop in Times Square.

A short trek up Route 221 to Floyd County High School will offer some of the best high school teams throughout the region, as well as a number of top out-of-state entries in the January 2nd and 3rd Chance Harman Memorial Tournament. The two-day extravaganza includes a popular silent auction that offers sports and other memorabilia from a wide range of sources.

If you haven’t started your Christmas shopping yet, the third installment of the Wild Bill gift suggestions may well pull you out of the jam. So far we’ve recommended the deodorizing toilet seat for the stinker on your list and the Pet Sweep to purportedly ease housekeeping duties for the home maker.

Today we look at four gifts for the pet fancier. Every pet owner knows how ole Puss and Fido like to unwrap a present. These, however, push the envelope.

Cosmic Catnip Bubbles: Everyone has blown bubbles through a ring dipped in a jar of soapy mix. But, this one, for your cat, spikes the juice with liquid catnip. Drives the cats wild as they go after the catnip bubbles floating around in mid-air. If it only came with a baton your feline friend would resemble a high-as-a-kite Lawrence Welk. This one gets a Five Star Wild Bill rating for ingenuity, excitement and flying fur.

Zombie Foot Dog Toy: A replica foot that doubles as a dog-chomper, complete with leg bone extension, bloody scratches and a squeaker inside to get your dog riled up. Concern here is how your dog distinguishes between the Zombie Foot and your bare foot while you’re sitting around reading The Star ? Negative rating for the annoying squeaking as well as the high costs of emergency room visits if your pup gets confused.

Cat Whack-A-Mole: A box-like contraption that has nine square holes shaped like a tic-tac-toe board. Things look promising until you realize the pet-owner has to pop the mole, on the end of a stick, randomly up through the holes. The cat on the packaging looks as if he’s thinking, “How long is this idiot going to hold that stick?” Neutral rating-Positives for the exercise value (Not the cat, your arm) Negative for getting boring in about three minutes.

Desktop Jellyfish Tank: For the executive on your list. Pitched as an unique desktop pet that comes with everything you need to set it up, then a few days later the live jellyfish arrives via overnight delivery. Assumably since it’s overnight, the jellyfish can sleep on the trip. Neutral rating- Positives for being something most people don’t have. Negative for the pricey cost of over $350. I never knew the market in jellyfish had gone through the roof.

Let’s now open the mailbag where I get scalped on ticket prices from a reader.

Dear Wild Bill: You said last week a ticket to the Military Bowl could cost as low as $20. The cheapest discount ticket price we’ve found was 2-3 times that amount. You got a secret source? (Harmony and Ed / Blacksburg).

Go through the bowl itself. As of Tuesday afternoon, a twenty-spot gets you in the gate. Those discount boys aren’t always the cheapest route. Once again, you always learn something when you read this column.

Until next time, I’m off to corporate headquarters with my Cosmic Catnip Bubbles. I know The Chief  has cats, so chaos will reign.

Send your catnip-high inquiries to [email protected]

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