Wild Bill’s Roanoke Valley Sports Roundup

There’s nothing more exciting than the run to the state tournaments in high school basketball.

With district tournaments behind us, the last two legs are at hand, and every Wild Bill ‘Big-11’ team qualified for regional play. The games get tougher as the cream comes to the top, so here’s a look at how each has faired through Tuesday night’s games.

Congratulations to every squad for a great 2012-13 campaign.

William Fleming- Qualified for AAA Northwest Region: defeated the Patriots 66-37 last Saturday in first-round; lost to Mountain View Tuesday night in quarterfinals  (season complete)

Patrick Henry– Qualified for AAA Northwest Region: lost to Battlefield in first round Saturday  (season complete)

Northside-qualified for Region III Division 3: next- Wednesday night vs Fort Defiance at Spotswood High School

Lord Botetourt-qualified for Region III Division 4: defeated Turner Ashby Tuesday night in first round- next- Thursday night vs E.C. Glass at E.C. Glass High School

William Byrd-qualified for Region III Division 4: defeated Harrisonburg Tuesday night- next- Thursday night vs Heritage at E.C. Glass High School

Salem-qualified for Region IV Division 4: next-Blacksburg Wednesday night at Carroll County High School

Cave Spring-qualified for Region IV Division 3: defeated Tazewell Monday night; next-Abingdon Wednesday night in Richlands,Va.

Hidden Valley-qualified for Region IV Division 4: lost Monday night to Magna Vista (season complete)

Glenvar-qualified for Region C Division 2; next- Wednesday night at Fort Chiswell

North Cross-qualified for VIC Division II: defeated Eastern Mennonite Tuesday night in first round-  next- Thursday night vs Hargrave Military at North Cross

Roanoke Catholic-qualified for VIC Division II: lost to Hargrave Military Tuesday night in first round  (season complete)

With college basketball’s March Madness just around the corner, those late night West Coast games will dominate the after-midnight television lineup. Accordingly, it’s time to bring you the latest version of Wild Bill’s late-night product reviews.

There seems to be a sudden rush of books pitching quirky remedies for confounding around-the-house problems and pests.

I considered using this opportunity to form some sort of Wild Bill Book Club, but decided it best to stay more in the realm of reviewing, ala Gene Shalit, than trying to go head-to-head with Oprah.

Plus, I figured if I pushed a book club, the Chief would probably want me to start a magazine where, like Oprah, I’d be on the cover every month. I assume our magazine would probably be called “B” or “WB”.

Moving forward, our first review is for a book with 10,001 home disaster solutions. I did the math on this one, and if you commit 5 to memory each day, you’ll get nearly 5 1/2 years worth of reading.

But, let the reader beware. This one tells you the best way to deal with wasps is by putting out a bowl of wine. Seems to me like a good way to engage with an angry swarm of intoxicated bees.

And, if you drop your cell phone in water, they tell you to cover the device with rice. I’ve heard rice is some type of dehydration vehicle, but my concern would be after-the-fact, I’d only be able to call China.

Thus, I give this book a neutral rating until I can wade through a few more remedies and these wasp welts go away.

The second book deals with pesky home pests from ants and roaches to bears, raccoons and kangaroos.

Want to rid your dog of fleas? Use an orange. Got a kangaroo on your roof? Wait a minute……I can figure this one out. Just look up and tell the little fellow, “Jump”.

Another problem solved in Aussie-land. And, just when I thought muffin-top was my biggest headache.

Until next time, send your hopping-good questions to: info@theroanokestar.com